he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
