Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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