first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize
