I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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