my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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