Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
