Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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