SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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