The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
It's blow job season.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize