awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
