Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
