If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
