So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
