K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
