Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
