Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
