I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize