Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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