love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Randomize
