Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
