At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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