So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
