doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize
