Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
