It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
