You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
false alarm. still invincible.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize
