I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize