I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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