We're like a lot better than the average bears
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
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