I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
