the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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