You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
