once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
