If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize