No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Help me help you realize you are a moron
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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