question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize