i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
We need a shit load of segways right now
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
