Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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