he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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