in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
