i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
