I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize