Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
