Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
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