D3 body, D1 cock
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
