I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
