you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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