If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
The feeling are messing with the penis
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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