You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
we made out on top of his cat.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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