I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
