hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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