But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
he was CRYING into my vagina
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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