Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
