So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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